Sophie's Story

      Last week I helped my friend/sister, Dana, bake Christmas cookies. During the course of our baking she asked me a question. I had been talking about how it has been hard for me to get into the Christmas spirit the past few years. She asked me, "what do you need so you can feel the Christmas spirit?"     That question stopped me for a minute. I had never considered that. As someone who is a community pharmacist, I always assumed it was because December is the time when most people tend to be worst. Retail workers are not often on the receiving end of the season of love and joy. This hasn't been the case for the past five years that I've been at my current job.     What do I need in order to feel the Christmas spirit?      I thought about this question on and off for the rest of the day and the next several days. I knew a few things I didn't need. I didn't need presents. I rejected the commercial aspect of Christmas a few years back....

      I have a confession to make. I don't like buying presents. I especially don't like buying presents at Christmas time.      I wasn't always like this. C and I used to enjoy a day of shopping and lunch in downtown Minneapolis. We'd buy presents for people we know and for each other. We'd wander around Macy's, go to the auditorium to see the Christmas display and have lunch at the Oak Grill. It was a lot of fun. Now it's all gone.     As I've grown older I've become a bit resentful of the present buying culture around Christmas. So much so that Thanksgiving has been nearly erased to make more time to shop. I've also lost my ability to find good presents for people. I have almost no idea what to give anyone anymore. I'm even having trouble finding little presents for St. Nicholas day. Most of my friends fall into two categories. Some of them have a lot of stuff and talk of clutter control. I don't wish to contribute to the clutter. Some...

           On my last birthday, C gave me a bear he made at Build a Bear. This is a store that has a selection on unstuffed toy animals and other creature which people can purchase and stuff. There are various items that allow the animal to make sounds or play specially recorded messages. When the paw/ hand of the item in pressed, the recording plays. There are also clothes and accessories to dress the toy.          C bought me an interactive bear. When it is turned on, the bear wiggles his ears and makes sounds according to what I say. It also says a few phrases. When he is turned off, the bear closes his eyes and starts to snore for a few minutes. He is named Sparkle and I like him very much.           I brought Sparkle over for my Mom to see. For those who don't read this often, my Mom has Alzheimer's. I had heard that sometimes dolls or stuffed animals provide comfort and companionship to those suff...

     Now that I have the ability to text, I don't talk to people on the phone much, except at work. Maybe it's because I don't want to bother anyone or reach them at a bad time. Another reason could be the ability to edit before hitting send. Once you say it it's out and there's nothing you can do about it except deal with the reaction. It could also have to do with my love of sending pictures and using Bitmoji.      When I do talk on the phone it tends to be a marathon session. I can talk on the phone for an hour or more with a someone I haven't heard from in awhile. Having bionic ear in this case is very helpful. The other person's voice goes right into my ear and I don't have to worry about getting "phone ear". I can also do other things while talking such as washing dishes or folding laundry. My favourite way to talk on the phone is sitting comfortably with a cup of tea and maybe a cat on my lap.    I had just such a conversation today. I s...

      It's 11 AM. The turkey is in the crockpot. The dishes are washed. C is in the kitchen preparing cornbread dressing with the cornbread I baked yesterday. This is something from his southern culture that we have incorporated into our meal. I wasn't sure I would like it as I was used to eating  traditional stuffing. This is baked in a dish in the oven and not put into the bird. Good for us, since we do not get a whole turkey, just a breast. It's become my favourite part of the meal next to the mashed potatoes.      The last week I noted that my Facebook memories show posts where I show pictures or write about things for which I am grateful. Some of them are pretty obvious like C, my job, the cats, our home and my coworkers. Some of them are a bit more interesting our like our furnace, cellphones and refrigerator.     Today I'm going to write about a few less obvious things that I'm grateful for.      Monday we went to Cannon...

           The weather app on my computer has something called E-Tree. I noticed it earlier this year. You get a seed. Then you are given a set of tasks to do daily that feed the tree. Whenever you do a task or access the app at certain times during the day you get points and the tree grows. When you get to a certain number of points a real tree is planted somewhere and you start over with another seed.          I know it's a ploy by the developers to get people to use the app more often. I'm not even sure if they really plant trees. The last pictures that show trees being planted were from over a year ago. Still I enjoy using the app and watching my E-Tree grow from a sapling into a proper little tree.          There have been some surprising side  benefits to doing this. I find that I'm learning things. Here are a few things I like about my E-Tree.          I discovered that N...

      Last week I harvested carrots from our garden. I filled two gallon sized bags with carrots and there are more carrots to harvest. One of the things I did was make carrot cake. I always wanted to make carrot cake with carrots I grew myself. I only needed to use one carrot. Maybe I'm a little biased, but it might have been the best carrot cake I've ever made. I may make more and freeze it. We've also been having stir fry about once a week. It's another good way to use carrots.      C and I went to a movie on Monday, The last time this happened was when we went to see the movie 'The Post' in 2017. I get motion sick in movie theatres so I have to take medicine if I want to see a movie. I wanted to see the movie 'Conclave'.       I forgot how nice theatres are now. The seats are armchairs where you can put your feet up. There's a place to put a cup of soda. The seats are far enough apart that you don't have to share an armrest with anyo...

     I wasn't planning on writing about the election but after waking up to find that Harris lost, I decided I can't keep my mouth shut. If you want to disown me, unfriend me or stop receiving links to this column, fine with me. Let me know and I'll take you off my list.    I went to bed last night hoping that some miracle would happen and we would have our first woman president. The miracle didn't happen. Instead the "Republican" won. It is deeply upsetting, hurtful and frightening. I'd like to explain why to you.    My father-in-law, and two great uncles fought in World War II. All of them were overseas. My father- in-law landed at Normandy on Omaha beach. He watched his buddies die in the water. That experience and others left him a changed man. He didn't do it because he had nothing else to do. He had a wife and daughter at home. He enlisted because he believed in America and didn't want fascism spreading to this country. If he were alive today...

     We've been spending the past few days getting caught up on things. Yesterday the weather was good and we decided to take a day trip to Red Wing. We were thinking about bringing our bikes but decided not to because of the wind.     It was a nice trip down although we did get into a bit of discussion over the radio. We have Sirius radio in the car and C likes to listen to MSNBC. I on the other hand would prefer music of no radio at all. There is a lot of talk about the upcoming election and frankly I get anxious when I listen to too much of it. Since we had agreed to have a relaxing day C turned the radio off.    Since we got a late start, we had lunch first. I got a jalapeno dip burger with tater tots. C got a California burger. The restaurant was really short staffed. It took a while to get our food. It was warm but not  hot. They did have tater tots which was something of a miracle. They are listed on the menu but when I order them I ge...

      Several months ago one of the customer service managers brought something into the pharmacy to show one of the techs. It was a small plastic bag with a crocheted turtle and a note. After a short discussion, the CS manager left the bag. I went over to the counter to look at it. The note inside said keep going and don't give up. I wanted the turtle so I picked up the bag and brought it to my work station. When I changed work stations, I picked up the bag and brought it with me. Then I put it in my pocket.  I felt a little like the character Gollum in the Lord of the Ring books (but without the evil side). I didn't want anyone to take the turtle.     On my lunch break I took a good look at the turtle. He has a green shell with brown legs and face that had eyes glued onto it.  The note said the he was crocheted by one of the members of the Random Acts of Crocheted Kindness Facebook group. They crochet small items like keychains, wiggle worms and seas...

     We are about halfway through our trip and so far it is going very well. I've been able to spend a good amount of time in the hot tub in the pool area soaking away cramped muscles. C likes talking to other couples that are also soaking in the hot tub. It's fun for me to watch hi make new friends like he does.    Yesterday we visited a couple that are part of the amateur music scene here in Door County. They moved up to Sturgeon Bay a few years ago. We only intended to visit a couple hours and spend the rest of the time exploring parts of Sturgeon Bay. Instead we wound up eating a long lunch with them at the restaurant below their condo. We had never met, but is was interesting that we had several things in common. We just couldn't stop talking. When lunch was over we had an hour and a half before our dinner reservation.    Our dinner was at the dining room of a popular resort on the shore of Lake Michigan. It's a warm, cozy room. They put mocktails...

         It's that time of year again. Time for us to pack up the the car and head east to Door County. C looks forward to this all year and is always anxious when it  is time to go. He likes to leave early so we can get up there as soon as we can.     We have been doing this for 20 years. Our first trips were Monday through Friday only so I wouldn't miss too much work.. Eventually we stayed a week in Door County and one day in Green Bay. We had our trips cut short twice. Once because I messed up our reservations and once when C was asked to help at a baptism. (I was upset about the last one for a long time,)     When we first came here I was working full time this was the only vacation I got. I badly needed this week of rest in order to keep going at work. C and I both worked full time so we got to spend a lot of needed time together. One year we came here less than a month after a  friend of mine died in a car wreck and six months...

     I have always believed that God has a great sense of humour. I was reminded of this a few weeks ago when I was asked to be part of the leadership for the children's Sunday school classes in my ward (Primary). The reason why this is so funny is because of the five women who have no children in my ward, I am the only one with no experience when it comes to children. No younger siblings to care for, no nieces and nephews that I spent time with and no young stepchildren. In other words the one least qualified to hold this position.   The reason why I accepted this calling was because the Primary President had asked for me. She is a woman for whom I have great respect. She was the Relief Society secretary when I was a counselor. She must have seen something in me that she thought would be helpful to her. Despite my woeful lack of qualifications and my inability to deal with most people under the age of 55, I accepted the calling.    My first Sunday in Prima...

     Hi, This is Barnaby. Mom has a busy day today so I am writing her column. Willow is helping me because her paws are smaller so she can type better than I can.    We are happy living here. This is a nice house and these are good humans. Here are a few reasons why we like living here.    Food and treats. We like the food that we get and are happy that we don't have to hunt. Sometimes Willow says she'd like to hunt the squirrels we see outside the window. I'm not sure about that. The squirrels look a little scary to me. C gives us a gravy stick that we share. It's really good although sometimes I think Willow gets more than her share. (No I don't- Willow) We also like our drinking fountain that has fresh water in it every day. I like to hide puff balls in it. Willow and Sophie don't like that when it happens    A nice house. We have a nice house. It has large windows that allow us to see the front and back yards. That is very helpful as we ...

     For many people the most wonderful time of the year is  Christmas. For me, it's fall.     There are many reasons why I love this time of year so much. today I'd like to share a few with you.     This is apple season. Apples are my favourite fruit and I live in a part of the country where apples are grown which means I can get get them fresh. I've even picked apples myself a few times. I like pairing apples and cheese which is sometimes my lunch at work. I like apple crisp too and have been known to eat it for breakfast. I have a couple recipes for apple cake which are good. I also like to make apple sauce with apples that have gone soft and are not crisp as I would like.    My favorite apple is Keepsake. It is a small sweet apple that stores well. They don't ripen until mid October and it's hard to find because it's not a popular as it used to be. Fortunately there are many other varieties that I like.    I also enjoy...

                In the years I've been writing this column, I've tried to steer away from politics.  There are enough spaces for people to argue political views that I didn't feel I needed to provide another. However, certain statements from some candidates for office have left me unable to stay silent. This is one of those times. If you disagree with me and wish to tell me so, I don't mind. I do ask that any comments be respectful.    Several days ago a candidate for national political office said that as much as he hated to admit it, school shootings are a fact of life. Something we just need to live with. On one hand, he isn't wrong, school violence is not a new thing. When I was in school in the mid 1980s I remember at least two bomb threats where the school was cleared until no threats were found in the building. I remember at least one bomb threat when I was in college. He's also not wrong about school shootings getting a...

     C and I were getting tired of eating in the same restaurants when we finish our longer bike rides. A couple of weeks ago we were planning a ride and discussing the post ride meal when C had an idea. Why don't we have a picnic?  I thought it was a great idea and we began to plan. C decided he would make egg salad. We would bring buns, chips and carrot sticks. We could put it in the big cooler and it would keep while we rode. Both of us were happy and excited.    The next day we packed our cooler, loaded our bikes and headed out to ride. When we were almost to our starting point we realized that we had for gotten to being paper plates and utensils. Oh well, it just meant we would need to buy them along with our drinks.     After our ride we stopped at a local grocery store. I discovered that I had put some plastic forks in a pocket of the cooler. C bought paper plates and drinks. We found a table next to the old train depot in Red Wing wit...

      This year I'm not going to be able to do my usual birthday lunch. None of the people I know are available to have lunch with me even with take out. I'm also working on my birthday, something that rarely happens. This year, my birthday is on the Friday of Labor Day weekend and it's my weekend to work. I didn't feel right making someone else take that evening shift since I have to work the next day anyway.    I decided that since our 20th wedding anniversary was last week, the days in between our anniversary and my birthday would be the days of celebration. We would find fun things to do. We'd bake my birthday cake together. We'd go for a bike ride. We'd have lunch together.     Before I started doing birthday lunches, I used to share my birthday cake. For a few years I would bring cake or some kind of treat to work and share it. I'm going to do that this year.     A few days ago we had lunch in St. Paul. We enjoyed a treat at C...

     C and I have a fundamental disagreement about people in general. C believes that most people are good, kind and willing to help. I believe that most people are unkind, mean and unwilling to help. I believe that some people enjoy being cruel and mean. C believes that bullies and those that are mean are just badly hurt people who have not dealt with their feelings.    Our opinions are based on our differing experiences. C for the most part has been treated kindly all his life. The mothers of his friends treated him like another son. (C's mother left the family when he was six years old.) Halfway through his senior year of high school a family took him in when they found out he was boarding with an elderly lady. (C's dad moved and C didn't want to change schools.)   Between the school bullying and working in community pharmacy, my experience has been quite different. I still remember a man that spit at me when I didn't have his prescription ready ( h...

     Twenty years ago today, I dressed in the most expensive dress I will ever own, had my hair, make up and nails done then walked into the garden of a historical house to take some pre wedding pictures.     Less than an hour later, I went from being a single woman with two cats to being a married woman with two cats, five stepchildren and a granddaughter.    At the demand of my mother, we were married in a Lutheran church in the traditional ceremony. I had banned any wedding march music and 1 Corinthians 13. We had a vase with with six lavender roses to honor close family members who had died. The processional was an instrumental piece from a movie. The organist had to learn it from a CD I had since there was no sheet music for it. I was not given away, I did not promise to obey and the words "til death do you part" were not uttered at all. C wrote a song that he sang during the ceremony. We walked up the aisle to "Now Thank We all Our God"   ...

     When I was a teenager, I read a book called The Little Princesses  by Marion Crawford. Published in 1950, it was about the British Royal family, particularly then Princesses Elizabeth and Margaret. Ms. Crawford was their nanny for 16 years.    When I got older I learned that Ms. Crawford who had left her employers on good terms, was ostracized after publication of the book. I couldn't understand why. It was a good book and gave a glimpse into what was like for the young girl who later became queen and her parents who were not supposed to become king and queen. There were no salacious details, no shocking revelations just a picture of  the family living their lives.    One of the books I've been  reading is, The Housekeeper's Diary   by Wendy Berry. She was a housekeeper at Highgrove House where Charles then Prince of Wales and Diana, Princess of Wales lived part time during their marriage. The subject of the book is a...

      I finally went through the box that I picked up  the last time I went to my parent's house. There were cards, school pictures, my books from Girls Scouts and a yellow square of fabric with a black button sewn in the middle of it. My initials were written on one corner of the fabric.     Why would I have saved it?  It wasn't a fancy button. It didn't look like it was cut off a shirt or other garment. There was nothing unusual or pretty about it. I was about to put it with the things I planned to throw away when it hit me. I knew where that button came from.     It was the infamous button from home ec class. That year we were learning to sew and clothing construction. Our class assignment was to sew a button on a piece of fabric.  For some reason the male classmates sitting on either side of me thought it would be fun to poke and pinch  me from shoulders to hips front and back while I did my assignment. I remember doing my ...

         Around the same time that a person running for national office made comments about people without children, it was also reported that he made a derogatory remark about childless cat ladies. I'm not going to write about the childless part, I addressed that last week. I am going to take issue with the use of cat lady as an insult.          I know two other women who are cat ladies. Neither one of them is miserable. In fact both of them are happy and content with their lives. They love the felines that live with them and take care of them. Besides cats, both of them are avid gardeners and enjoy surrounding themselves with plants and flowers. One of them is a talented photographer who takes pictures of landscapes. wild animals and of course her beautiful cat.          I did a quick search of the internet asking if pets make people happier. Most of what I saw was yes, although there were a few articles from s...

     A week or so ago a political candidate for national office made news by saying that he felt childless people have no stake in the country. There were many responses to this remark, mostly pictures of childless women making a difference in this country.     I'm not a famous or wealthy so I'm not contributing in that way, but I would like to explain why, as a childless woman, I do have a stake in this country.     I have five stepchildren and eight grandchildren. Although I was not involved in raising them as Kamala Harris was with her stepchildren, I do care about them. As my stepchildren get older I want them to have access to healthcare including mental health. I want them to have financial opportunities so they can fashion a good life for themselves.     Most of my grandchildren are older and for them I want to opportunity for education, college or trade school. I want them to be able to to earn enough money from one job so t...

    One of the signs of getting older is the death of performers that you enjoyed. Last week, Bob Newhart, one of my favourite comedians, passed away at age 94.        Part of the reason why I loved Bob Newhart so much is  that he didn't seem like he was trying to be funny. He just was. I  also like that, as far as I know, he didn't use fowl or crude language. He wasn't mean and insulting. He would just poke fun at himself and situations he found himself in.     I think another reason why I liked him is because he grew up in Chicago. He was a midwestern guy. His first show, "The Bob Newhart Show" was set in Chicago. I could relate to that. It looked more normal to me. I also like the fact that he looked like a middle aged guy, even when he wasn't a middle aged guy. He wasn't trying to hip or cool, he just did what he liked and it worked.      A few days ago I watched Bob Newhart interviews on various shows. He was asked wh...

   When my parents moved to a senior apartment closer to where my siblings and I live, they didn't sell the house right away. This was mostly for the comfort of my father who wasn't sure about moving from the house he built and the town he lived in for neatly 60 years. Now that they have settled in and my dad has accepted that he will not be able to live in the house again, the house is being sold.     There were a few things that belonged to me still at the house so yesterday C and I drove down there. I had my house key and a list of things I wanted to take and a few things that my dad wanted.    It rained the entire way there. C and I chatted and listened to the radio while we headed on the roads south. We went through St. Peter around Mankato and around the hairpin turnoff that dad always warned me about when I drove that way. One of the things I thought about is that this would be the last time I would see that house and go to that town.   ...

     Last week the pharmacy accounts receivable person brought a small plastic bag into the pharmacy. She found it and showed it to the tech that was working with me. Inside the bag was a small crocheted green and brown turtle with plastic eyes. There was also a note in the bag. It read "I am not lost. I am just alone. If I made you smile, please take me home. The race does not always go to the swiftest, but to the one who persists. Keep going" When I read the note it made me tear up a little. The A.R. person left it on the counter and the tech went back to her work.     Once I saw that no one would claim it, I went to the counter and picked it up. I put it under my terminal. When I moved to another terminal I took the turtle with me. In fact I felt somewhat possessive of it. I finally put the turtle in my bag so that it wouldn't get lost. I was happy to take it home.    A few days later I took it out and felt the soft yarn. I rubbed it and squeez...

     C had some exciting news to tell me. Our elderly female neighbor was downsizing with an eye to moving into a smaller place sometime in the next few years. C had gone to visit and play his new song for her. During the course of the conversation she offered to give him an organ. After showing him the features of the organ, he said yes. When he picked me up from work he told me about it.    I was not happy about this. For the past several years we were trying to declutter and get rid of things we no longer need and use. The last thing we need is an organ.     Where were we going to put it? Our living room is not that large. The family room in the basement would be the best place, but neither of us liked the thought of a 400 plus pound instrument going down our stairs. There was only one place it could go, in the music room with the rest of our instruments.   I had ideas about what I wanted for our music room. I wanted to be able to store in...

     We finished watching the last movie in the Lord of the Ring series. This could possibly be the worst movie I've ever seen.    Part of this is because the movie was long, over three hours. I'm at the point where I simply cannot sit for that long. I have to get up and move around a little or I'll get stiff and sore. There were too many long battle scenes and too may things that were drawn out that could have moved along a little quicker. It felt long and clunky. I covered my eyes for much of the movie because I couldn't watch anymore fighting and killing.    There were a few good parts. I like the part where Eowyn, a shieldmaiden, carried a sword in her saddle and rode with the men to battle. She and Merry Brandybuck killed the Witch-King. I liked the fact that Galadriel, a female elf, was a powerful character.    I enjoyed watching Aragorn, one of the Fellowship of the Ring, discover he was the heir to an ancient kingdom and wielder of a ...

     C and I finished reading "The Hobbit" a few weeks ago. Since it was a long book we got an audiobook as opposed to reading it to each other as we had originally planned. I enjoyed the book. C said that the movie was even better. I was looking forward to watching the movie.    The plan had been to read all the Ring series books before watching the movies. C got a little impatient so we decided to watch the movies before we finished reading all the books. We started with the first movie 'An Unexpected Journey'. It followed the book mostly and was entertaining. The aggravating part was that it ended on a cliffhanger and meant that we'd have to watch another movie to see what happens next. Fortunately for us it meant just renting the next movies as opposed to having to wait for it to come out.     The next movie was 'The Desolation of Smaug'. This is where it didn't follow the book well, something that irritates me which is why I don't watch movie...

     I think it will come as no surprise to anyone who reads this that I am a cat person. I like cats. My favourite cartoon is the Pink Panther.     I actually like all animals and sometimes fantasize about having a dog especially on good weather days when walking a dog looks like fun. It's fun going out to parks like Minnehaha and watching people walking all kinds of dogs. Then I remember that there is a lot of responsibility in caring for a dog. They need to be taken out to do their business, they need to be walked and they need a certain amount of space to roam. The kind of lifestyle I have would not be good for a dog. For much of my life I worked a lot and lived in houses with small yards. Thankfully, I like cats.    One of my reasons for buying my first house is because I wanted to have cats. I was single and working a lot. I wanted to have something in my life beside my job. I also wanted companionship and cats were just right for me. Workin...