Staying in Touch

      Earlier this week, my friend Mickey, turned 50 years old. I have known her all my life. I know this because I have seen pictures of the two of us. I was in an infant seat and Mickey was sitting next to me. I cannot remember a time when I didn't know who she was.
   After graduation, we parted ways. I went to North Dakota and she went to a small tech school a few hours away. We sometimes wrote to each other and if we were in town at the same time we would spend some time together.
  Over the years our paths continued to diverge. Mickey got married to an abusive man with whom she had a child. That marriage quickly ended. She moved back to the town we grew up in. I saw her and her daughter whenever I was in town visiting my parents. Sometimes we would go out and do something. Sometimes we'd visit at her apartment and play with little Ellie.
  Once her parents retired to South Dakota, she moved out there too. We wrote letters to each other. Sometimes we would talk on the phone. We would talk about all kinds of things, jobs, boyfriends, Ellie, cats and life in general.
  When Mickey remarried I went to South Dakota to stand up with her at the wedding. The night before the wedding, Mickey and her friends took me out to Deadwood. It is a historical town in the Black Hills area of South Dakota. There are several casinos there. I was given a roll of quarters and told that I could not leave the casino until I had lost the entire roll. It took me until after midnight to do so. For some reason, I had an unreal streak of luck at the slot machine. (This was the first and last time I ever gambled.)
  I got up early the next morning. Ellie was hungry for breakfast. Mickey and her future husband were sound asleep. I looked after Ellie and then prepared what we would need for the wedding.
  It was one disaster after another. When we got to the church it was locked. Then Mickey got a serious upset stomach. She desperately needed some Maalox. It was a Sunday and all the stores were closed except one gas station. I was able to get her some Tums. The best man was supposed to meet me halfway down the aisle and escort me to the front of the church. As he took my arm he whispered in my ear, "May I show you to your table?" I knew he felt like a waiter in his tux and I had to work hard not to chuckle. I had already had a small argument with the minister who was officiating at the wedding during the rehearsal. I was tired and wanted to just get it over with.
   I managed to last through the cake and punch reception. The newlyweds left for their honeymoon. Ellie went with her grandparents. I went to find something to eat. I wanted to get out of my dress, high heeled shoes and into normal clothes.
  That marriage didn't last long either....
   A few years later Mickey and ellie came to visit me. I was living in a nice house and dating a guy. I wanted Mickey to meet my boyfreind so I arranged a little dinner party. I invited Dick, my next door neighbor, over. I didn't want Mickey to feel like an odd person. Dick liked to hunt and fish like Mickey so they would have a few things to talk about.
  Dick and Mickey got along well. They got along so well that they started a long distance relationship and before long were making wedding plans. As I had already stood up for her twice and both marriages failed, I told her that another person should stand up with her. 
   For awhile we were neighbors. It was good to have my friend living close by again. I remember the two of us chatting on the phone and talking walks.
   That ended when I changed jobs and moved to Wisconsin. I was sad to leave.
   We stayed in touch after the move. Things were not going well. Neither Mickey or I realised that Dick was more than a little possessive and controlling. There was another divorce and move back to South Dakota.
   I got busy with work and with other things. We still kept in touch, but not as freqently. I was working a lot more and had little free time.
   Fast forward to earlier this week. Mickey belongs to a Red Hat group. Since she was now 50, she is entitled to wear a read hat and purple clothes. I sent her a birthday present of red and purple items. On her birthday I called to sing "Happy Birthday" to her. We talked for over an hour. It was good.
   I realised that I really need to stay in touch with her on a more regular basis. It's not often that a friendship of more than 40 years comes along. I have a lot of stationary that I don't use. I could go back to writing letters to her like I did so many years ago. Email is fast, but there's nothing like opening your mailbox and getting a real live letter. I know she'd like it.