19

 

   C and I celebrated our 19th wedding anniversary yesterday. Two days after the actual date. Like many couples I had to work because I didn't block the day off. It wasn't the first time I had worked on our anniversary.

   I married late in life because I saw no reason to get married. I wasn't beautiful and had a very demanding career. I just didn't think there was a man in the world who would want a short, stout, bookish, cat loving woman who was devoted to being a good pharmacist. Marriage was for attractive girls who wanted to have children.

   Then I met C. He didn't mind that I was bookish, stout and had a family that consisted of two cats. He was just fine with me and my career. We fell in love and decided to get married.

   I thought I knew what I was getting myself into I think most people who get married think they know what they are getting into, but I don't think it is possible to really know until after the celebrating is over and you are left to build a life with the person you just promised yourself to. I'd like to share a few things that I learned about marriage. These are in no particular order.

   I spent a lot of time alone when I was single. I liked being alone with my cats. I had things that I liked to do. I liked drinking tea and eating pastries on Sunday mornings when I wasn't working. I liked riding my bike and going shopping by myself. I liked driving to Burnsville and walking around the mall, eating in the food court or maybe at another restaurant.

   I thought that I wouldn't like living with someone else. Never having my own space. Having to take someone else into consideration all the time.

   I learned that living with C is nice. It was nothing like what I thought it would be. Sometimes we spend time together watching TV or doing household chores. Sometime we each do something else like when he plays his guitar and I knit. Sometimes he watches a show on his laptop and I write or read. We take care of the house and garden together. He and I spend time together and enjoy each other's company even doing things like running errands or long car trips. 

  I didn't realize how nice it would be to have someone there for support during hard times. When I've had to make some challenging decisions or just need someone to give me a reality check, I have C.

   A few years back when I developed severe anemia. I discovered what it is like to have someone take care of me. When I was single I took care of me. There was none else. Fortunately I was always able to take care of myself. When I had the anemia, I couldn't take care of myself. C took care of me, even though it was sometimes difficult.

   Another side benefit to marrying C is that he has good taste in clothes. A few times he has helped me to choose an outfit to wear on my first day at a new job. I'm not very good at matching colours so he has also helped me in this area too. If I'm not sure that two articles of clothing match, he'll tell me.

   I'm very grateful to have C in my life and grateful that we have been married for 19 years. It's been a wonderful journey and it's not over yet.