Now I Know

  Many years ago my mother introduced me to a young woman named Kori. Kori was about my age and was working as a reporter for a local newspaper. My mother thought Kori needed a friend as she was new to the area and we seemed to have a few things in common. We hung around each other and became friends.
  We never had that much in common though. Kori liked to run around and chase men. I was much more quiet and reserved. The party and bar scene just wasn't for me. I was starting my pharmacy career and was still learning a lot of things. I worked long hours and was not interested in a guy unless he could hold a good conversation and was mostly sober.
  I continued to hang around Kori because she brought me out of my comfort zone. I also thought that she needed a real friend. Someone who would be honest with her. Someone she could trust. I also thought she needed someone who could be a voice of reason. Some of the guys she dated were jerks. I remember she dated one guy who kicked her dog in the ribs when the came back to her house after their first date. She was crazy about him and couldn't spend enough time with him. I wasn't so sure. I was concerned. I tend to judge people by how they treat animals and people who are not "important" to them. I told Kori that a guy who would casually kick a dog could also casually backhand his girlfriend.
  I didn't want to be right, but I was. Although it fortunately never came to real serious physical abuse he did slap her. He also stole her checkbook and helped himself to part of her bank account.
  Then she met Tom. Tom lived with his brother across the alley from Kori. He was starting his life over in Minnesota after a rough past. He was about 20 years older and had been married three times. He seemed like a nice guy. After dating for awhile he proposed and Kori accepted.
  They moved in together after the engagement. I would come over to visit them. Sometimes they would get into really bad fights. I would be sitting quietly wondering what to do. Sometimes those fights got pretty ugly. Kori said some awful things. Tom may have too, but I don't remember. It was a  rocky engagement.
   As the engagement wore on Kori's other friends were not supportive. Friends that had agreed to participate in the wedding backed out. I remained because if there was a time that Kori needed a friend it was now. When her personal attendant backed out at the last minute I agreed to step in even though I was one of the bridesmaids.
  At the rehearsal dinner I took Kori aside. I told her that there was still time to back out. I was thinking of all the fights and all the times she told me about things that Tom did that she didn't like. I didn't think that any of this was going to stop once they were married. I told her that although it would be embarrassing and maybe expensive, she could back out. Once she was married backing out would be a lot harder. She assured me that Tom was the man for her and that she truly loved him. I hoped she was right.
   It was an awkward wedding. Kori's family were from small towns in Wisconsin. Tom's family were inner city folk. The two families sat on opposite sides of the room and didn't mix. Those of us in the wedding party tried to dance to the music that Kori and Tom had picked. It was mostly hip hop. The only vivid memory I had was attempting to do the Cha Cha Slide. It didn't go well. I was relieved when it was over.
  A month after the wedding I took them out to dinner. They seemed happy and well. I hoped I was wrong.
  I got a call from Kori a few weeks after that. She was pregnant and was planning to divorce Tom. He wanted to buy a new truck. She had told him that they didn't have the money for it. She told him that she would leave him if he bought the truck. He bought it anyway.
  I blew up at her. I told her that making threats was stupid and she shouldn't do that. I also said that that wasn't the way to resolve a conflict in a marriage. I told her that being a single parent wasn't easy and that she needed to think about something else besides herself for a change. I was not nice or diplomatic. I had wanted to say these things for a long time. I still cared about her, but felt it was time for tough love.
   She got mad as I expected and yelled right back. I didn't know what I was talking about. I had never been married and had never really dated. Who was I to say those things to her? She hung up and we never spoke again.
  A few years later I sent a Christmas card with just my name on it. I got back a picture of a toddler. No name, no age and no way to tell if the toddler was a boy or girl. The toddler had Kori's red hair so I knew that she had a child.
  Life went on for me. I moved to Little Town, changed jobs, met C and married him. I changed jobs again. All those years I still wondered. Where was Kori? How was she doing? Did she stay married to Tom? Was she happy? Was she well? C and I moved to St. Paul. I wondered if she was in still in Minneapolis.
  There was no way to know. I had erased all my tracks. I hadn't kept up with the friends that Kori and I had in common. She's never be able to find me.
   This morning I logged onto Facebook. I had a friend request. It was Kori. I checked out the page and looked at the pictures. It was her, after all these years. She's not married anymore, she has two children and she lives in Wisconsin. She went back to school and became a nurse. She looked well and happy in her pictures. I sent her a message. I told her that I'd been wondering all these years and I was happy to hear from her. She responded and it was good.
  We have some catching up to do. Certainly neither of us is doing what we thought we'd be doing. It will be fun to find out what happened. I'm looking forward to getting to know the person she's become. I don't have to wonder anymore. Now I know.