Mr. Wonderful

 


   One time I was in a store and saw a small box. The box had a miniature figure of a man inside holding a bouquet of flowers. The outside of the box said 'Mr. Wonderful'. I suppose it was one of those gag presents that a single woman could get along with 'grow a date'. ( A sponge figure of a man holding flowers that you put into water. Once wet it gets larger although not life size.)

  We are approaching our 16th wedding anniversary. Sixteen years ago this coming Friday, C and I stood among our family and friends and started this journey we are now on. As I contemplate this anniversary, I think about what makes Mr. Wonderful truly Mr. Wonderful.

   I wasn't one of those girls who dreamed about what my future spouse would be like. I wasn't planning on getting married. Marriage was for beautiful women, tan, athletic and well versed in social graces. Someone who was tall, thin and looks amazing in white. Not someone who is short, stout, bookish, loves her job and prefers to socialize with cats and humans who have cats. I was planning on being the spinster aunt taking care of everyone and everything. 

  One warm January day I went into a coffeeshop for something to drink. I was intrigued by the name of the coffeeshop as well as the fact that is was built into the side of a cave. A tall, handsome, dark haired musician made me my drink. I didn't know it at the time, but I had just met Mr. Wonderful. 

  My Mr. Wonderful was starting his life over after a bad marriage and a tough divorce. He was working as a barista to pay the bills and working as a musician to feed his heart and soul. He didn't court me with expensive presents, chocolate and flowers. We courted me with a 12 string guitar and songs that he wrote himself. He didn't have much money, so I would think up imaginary holidays to justify paying for our dates. I had fun doing that. He didn't have much in the way of material goods, but what he had he shared with me. All I really wanted was someone to love me as I am, short, stout, bookish, cat lover and career woman. He did and still does.

  I didn't want to be pampered or sheltered. (well maybe pampered just a little...) What I wanted was a partner. Someone to share things with. Someone who would love me no matter what. Someone who likes cats. someone who can tolerate 80s music.

  Neither of us knew what we were getting into when we got married. We knew that there would be tough times. There have been. Together we've survived the death of three cats, six job changes, one major surgery, a serious family rift and challenges with adult children. We knew there would be good times. There were trips to South Carolina, walks on the beach, trips to Chicago and Milwaukee, Door County. There have been errands and romantic dinners at home. We've made numerous trips to the Arboretum. 

  I don't want the little plastic guy in the box who never changes. I want someone who loves me for me, who tolerates my quirks and wants me to be a better person that what I am. Someone who believes in me when I don't believe in myself. Someone who cheers me on when I can't. Someone who wants me to do the same for him.

  That's my Mr. Wonderful. aka C.

Happy Anniversary honey. I love you. Always.

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