Useful Inventions
Does anybody invent anything anymore? I'm not talking about new apps for phones and such, I'm talking about completely new things. Lately it seems that all that is happening is remakes,sequels and TV shows made into movies and various technology things are constantly being upgraded so the item you bought 6 months ago is obsolete. Things are being made smaller, but not completely new.
There are a few things I wish someone would invent. If anyone reading this actually manages to invent one or more of these items, I promise I will not try to sue you for royalties or anything like that. All I ask is that I be allowed to purchase the item at a generous discount. These items are not listed in any particular order.
Run resistant nylon stockings. Note that I do not say run proof. I don't think run proof is possible. I do think that someone should be able to come up with a nylon stocking that doesn't develop a run if you wear it,wash it or look at it funny. Part of my sock drawer is taken up with nylons where one of the pair has developed a run. Sometimes I can find another to match it, but most of the time the colour is just different enough that I can't. Very aggravating. I get tired of having to go to the store every other month to buy a bunch of stockings and it seems just when I find a colour I like it is discontinued.
A "cat vac". This is a small vacuum cleaner that has grooming tool attachments. It allows you to groom your cat or dog and the hair is sucked up right away. Actually you are vacuuming your companion animal (I got in trouble once for referring to them as "pets".) Since many cats and dogs are afraid of vacuum cleaners this one would need a quiet motor or one that sounds like purring.
I would also like to see someone come up with a device that finds lost items. This device would consist of a main finder device and several small microchips or something that you could attach to things you commonly lose. You could attach chips to your keys, glasses, remote controls, cell phones, Ipods etc. The way it would work is that when you lose something you turn on the main finder device and it picks up a signal from the chip attached to the lost item. The finder could either beep or flash when it is near the lost item or act as a GPS and tell you where to look.
Knowing that the finder device could also be misplaced it would be programmed to beep or flash when it detects clapping or to react when it "hears" a preprogrammed phrase such as "Where the heck are you this time!". Obviously this could only be used at home, most likely it would only have a limited detection range. To me it would be quite useful. I wouldn't be rooting around searching frantically for things. I could calmly turn on my finder device and have it located and in my hands in less than ten minutes.
I came up with the idea for the stupid driver indicator several years ago. I called it the stupid driver gun back then, but since gun control is such a hot topic these days I thought the name change would be better. It is a device that allows you to shoot something, a suction cup dart with a flag on it for instance, at someone who is driving badly. When a car has a certain number of darts on it, the local police or highway patrol could pull the driver over to determine if they are breaking any laws or just being really dumb.
I think this would help reduce the amount of road rage incidents. If some one cuts you off, don't curse at them or make gestures or speed up,pass them and then brake. All you need to do is dart them. If you are driving and find that you are getting darted a lot you may want to rethink your driving habits. If your child borrows the car and returns it with a lot of darts on it you may need to give them a bit more driving instruction (or restrict car use).
The down side is that the driver can pull off to the side of the road and remove the darts and go on driving like an idiot. Oh well nothing is fool proof.
I think any one of these inventions would make life easier. Surely we have enough creative people that someone should be able to make one or more of these a reality. Just remember, if you are the one, I get a discount. A nice deep discount.
There are a few things I wish someone would invent. If anyone reading this actually manages to invent one or more of these items, I promise I will not try to sue you for royalties or anything like that. All I ask is that I be allowed to purchase the item at a generous discount. These items are not listed in any particular order.
Run resistant nylon stockings. Note that I do not say run proof. I don't think run proof is possible. I do think that someone should be able to come up with a nylon stocking that doesn't develop a run if you wear it,wash it or look at it funny. Part of my sock drawer is taken up with nylons where one of the pair has developed a run. Sometimes I can find another to match it, but most of the time the colour is just different enough that I can't. Very aggravating. I get tired of having to go to the store every other month to buy a bunch of stockings and it seems just when I find a colour I like it is discontinued.
A "cat vac". This is a small vacuum cleaner that has grooming tool attachments. It allows you to groom your cat or dog and the hair is sucked up right away. Actually you are vacuuming your companion animal (I got in trouble once for referring to them as "pets".) Since many cats and dogs are afraid of vacuum cleaners this one would need a quiet motor or one that sounds like purring.
I would also like to see someone come up with a device that finds lost items. This device would consist of a main finder device and several small microchips or something that you could attach to things you commonly lose. You could attach chips to your keys, glasses, remote controls, cell phones, Ipods etc. The way it would work is that when you lose something you turn on the main finder device and it picks up a signal from the chip attached to the lost item. The finder could either beep or flash when it is near the lost item or act as a GPS and tell you where to look.
Knowing that the finder device could also be misplaced it would be programmed to beep or flash when it detects clapping or to react when it "hears" a preprogrammed phrase such as "Where the heck are you this time!". Obviously this could only be used at home, most likely it would only have a limited detection range. To me it would be quite useful. I wouldn't be rooting around searching frantically for things. I could calmly turn on my finder device and have it located and in my hands in less than ten minutes.
I came up with the idea for the stupid driver indicator several years ago. I called it the stupid driver gun back then, but since gun control is such a hot topic these days I thought the name change would be better. It is a device that allows you to shoot something, a suction cup dart with a flag on it for instance, at someone who is driving badly. When a car has a certain number of darts on it, the local police or highway patrol could pull the driver over to determine if they are breaking any laws or just being really dumb.
I think this would help reduce the amount of road rage incidents. If some one cuts you off, don't curse at them or make gestures or speed up,pass them and then brake. All you need to do is dart them. If you are driving and find that you are getting darted a lot you may want to rethink your driving habits. If your child borrows the car and returns it with a lot of darts on it you may need to give them a bit more driving instruction (or restrict car use).
The down side is that the driver can pull off to the side of the road and remove the darts and go on driving like an idiot. Oh well nothing is fool proof.
I think any one of these inventions would make life easier. Surely we have enough creative people that someone should be able to make one or more of these a reality. Just remember, if you are the one, I get a discount. A nice deep discount.
I know they make the locater thingy, it's just kind of expensive.
ReplyDeleteHow about instead of darts, you use a paint gun? Use a reflector orange paint, and then the bad driver is not only marked, but he's also more noticeable and other people can take evasive action.
The problem, of course, is that many people are lousy shots, and they would wind up hitting the wrong car. Me, for instance.
Great ideas KC! All would be very useful. I agree with Paul about the potential problem related to the dumb driver devise. However, I'd love to help work out the bugs on the prototype.
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree that with today's technology some of these "fun and useful" toys could become the next "hot" item!
Keep that thinking cap on, my deear...